


Carpe Demon

by Argyle



Category: Good Omens
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-06-25
Updated: 2008-06-25
Packaged: 2019-02-11 20:54:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12943686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Argyle/pseuds/Argyle
Summary: Every good plan has a little wiggle room.





	Carpe Demon

"'Make time for yourself. Get a haircut. Mid-century is a good look for you, and no, those shoes don't make you look like Mick Jagger. Just be yourself. Find comfort in collaborative efforts: there's more than one way to hold a divining rod. Coordinate! Next week, expect to prosper in the field of witty inventions.'"

"What's that?"

"Sagittarius."

"What?"

"'Your Stars Today.' From the _Advertiser_."

Crowley blinked. "I'm not a Sagittarius. I don't even have a birthday."

"Exactly," said Aziraphale. "Which means you're _not_ not a Sagittarius, either." He cleared his throat. "You love red meat."

"Go on."

"That's it."

"Leo?"

"Aries."

"Okay. Try Taurus."

Aziraphale glanced at him over the rims of his glasses.

"Well?"

"'Break out from the expected. There's nothing like a little wind in your hair: a drive would do wonders for your outlook. And you know, the guys back at the office won't miss you! They don't even know what you do, but maybe think you're a double agent from Petrograd, spiriting microfiche from the vaults. Don't worry, Taurus. Your secret is safe with us. Just remember to pack a lunch.'"

"No, no." Crowley thought for a moment. And then: "What about Virgo?"

"'Seize the day does not mean sleeping 'til noon. Nor three. Yes, even if the blankets are really comfortable, and you were having a great dream about seventeenth century Japan with sea monsters an' suchlike. So now you'd do well to make up for it. Did you realize your friend spent twenty minutes in front of his wardrobe, picking out that jumper? Yes, really. But the blue does bring out his eyes. You even thought so yourself, glancing over all stealthily as he read the Opinion page. What you _didn't_ know is that he forgot to wear pants today. Tomorrow, take it easy.'"

"Okay, Aziraphale. Consider me properly scandalized," Crowley sniffed. "You can't be _that_ bored."

"It's all here," said Aziraphale, a trifle pettishly. A flush was spreading over his cheeks. "Black and white."

"Uh huh. May I?"

Aziraphale handed him the newspaper.

Crowley read it. Then he read it again. "Well I'll be," he said. "So."

"So? Oh. Crowley, don't you dare. I'll not— Mmm."


End file.
